But if you absolutely have to deal with them, below are some ways to understand why they act the way they do. Their universe is usually small, with statements that have too many "should" and "must." They have idealist views, and a need to impose and make others believe that their universe is the better one. They devalue others and put them at a lesser position.
They will usually dislike you if you don't buy into that.2. That is why they use other people to fill up the inner gap. They lack the ability to feel confidence internally, and instead find a sensation of superiority by seeing others as inferior. They usually have points of views that are fixated and most of the time not valid, since they are usually the type who only reads the cover of the magazine to look smart, and then is opinioned about it.
They usually have a lot of friends, but just superficially. They may have found ways to attract a lot of people into their world, but usually the ones who feed into their arrogance. They may also harshly criticize others who don't buy into their views.5.
Most of the time, arrogance can indicate an excessive need for self-importance and wanting to be the center of attention. It could be the root of many problems, from anxiety to depression to the inability to sustain healthy and fulfilling relationships.
While normal levels of self-worth, self-confidence and self-value are all essential for people who want to be fully functioning, there is a line between these characteristics and being arrogant.
Most of you have probably had an encounter with a self-centered person.
The first piece of advice for dealing with such people is to try to stay away from them, or to have clear boundaries with them since they may become energy vampires. Arrogant people take too many measures to protect their self-image.
While any healthy functioning human does relative levels of cost benefit analysis in different situations, a self-centered person looks for vast benefits with minimum effort, and this is usually at the expense of others. Don't be their door mat, and have clear boundaries with them. If you have to defend yourself, make it short and to the point since they are not the best listeners, and have a thick wall guarding their self-image. Have compassion for them since they usually have had a past that created a wrong type of self-protection mode for them.
There is a part of them that they don't like and are trying hard to cover.
While many people have had pasts that are not perfect, nor close to it, self-centered people are lacking the skills to address these issues in a productive way. At the end, remember that you can have compassion for someone, but at the same time hold them accountable for their actions and have clear self-boundaries.
For them, people are either very good or very bad, depending on who admires them and who does not.
In other words, if you fulfill their wishes, you're good. It is hard for self-centered people to have a real sense of empathy. They are usually successful on the surface and things look good since they go the extra mile to make their persona look as flawless as possible. They usually maximize their contributions and minimize that of others.
They can be your lover one minute and a hater the next. Even if they do, it is usually conditional, depending on what they are receiving from the source they are empathizing with. But when you go deep inside, the real feeling of inadequacy reveals itself. They expect too much for what they are willing to give.
This is the type that thinks his government, society, people around him and the world owes it to him without him giving much in return.